Virtual Insanity

Christmas!

Mon, 24 Dec 2007 20:44:32 GMT

Merriadoc Christmas! I wish you,

Lots of gifts under the Christmas tree,
A cheery evening full of memories so jolly,
Lazy afternoons,
Colourful balloons,
Random moments,
Understanding parents,
And crazy, endless nights.

:)

Ah, I love the presents I got. I'm happy with them. I feel like taking pictures of them and posting them up. I was seriously afraid I was going to get a dozen dragons like last year (I had an obsession with them. I still like them, but not to that extent!)

Anyway, I got to help clean up.

Cheerio!

-- J.

Ps. Merriadoc is the full name of Merry from Lord of the Rings. :p

Anastasia and joys.

Wed, 12 Dec 2007 17:24:38 GMT

Disney's Anastasia becomes so much funnier after you've learned about the history of Russia in the 1900s. :D

I remember the first time I saw it (I was 10 at the time?) and I didn't know that some of the characters there were either "real" or based on real people.

I especially like Rasputin. :p

I recommend to all to see Disney's Anastasia once more after studying about Russia. I need to tell my sis that also (she's obsessed with Russia and the Russian language). :]

Oh, and on another note, I finished my last exam today. Yay! So it's one and a half more days of school and then I'm out for three weeks! And the guy I have a crush on invited me to a party in Tartu (a city two hours by train away from Tallinn). :D :D :D Of course he invited some other people, but imagine my joy! :D I was practically grinning the whole time.

But the sucky thing is that I think he's interested in this girl from grade 12 (he's in 10th grade, although he's 18, whereas I am in 11th). :( Yesterday they apparently went to the movies together. I'm really hoping it's just like a "friends" thing, but I'm comforting myself with the fact that she'll be gone after this year to Florida. :D

And on tuesday we went with a whole group first to a pizza place (one of my classmates, our friend R., my crush, the other girl and me) and we had so much fun. I just wanted to stay there forever because this was the first time in a long while that I've had so much fun. But... we had our last exam(s) [some people had 2] so we decided at 5:15-30 ish that it would be best to start heading home (concidering it takes about an hour for most of us to get home from the center. (most of us live on the outside of the center, which sucks).

In general, these last two days were awesome. :) And I think I did really well on my last exam (English). You know, just that little hunch you get. So today when I came back home I started watching the Season 6 of Family Guy (I didn't have the time to watch it before, so I caught up), then tried watching Scrubs but the links didn't want to work :( so I put on Anastasia because I was in the mood for Disney (classics) and now I'm going to watch The Road To El Dorado because I never really watched it and I am a biigg Disney Classics freak.

:) :)

Ah, good days, good days. I feel really happy right now.

Just Some Fun

Mon, 10 Dec 2007 16:00:30 GMT

I was bored. It's exam week, what do you expect? :p

You Belong in London

A little old fashioned, and a little modern.
A little traditional, and a little bit punk rock.
A unique soul like you needs a city that offers everything.
No wonder you and London will get along so well.

What City Do You Belong In?

You Should Date An Australian!

You're a down to earth, outdoorsy kind of girl
And you need a guy who can keep up with your adventures
A rugged Austrailian guy is just your style
Better start learning how to surf!

Which Foreign Guy Should You Date?

You Are Quite Worldly

You've done a good bit of worldly exploring, and you have an international perspective.
And you're definitely looking forward to your future adventures abroad.
You've got the passport, the desire to travel, and maybe even the language skills.
Now all you need are the means!

How Worldly Are You?

You Are 28% Phobic

Scared? You? Not really. Everyone has a few normal phobias, and you're no exception.
It's okay to be afraid of a few things. You wouldn't be human if you weren't.

How Phobic Are You?

You Belong in Amsterdam

A little old fashioned, a little modern - you're the best of both worlds. And so is Amsterdam.
Whether you want to be a squatter graffiti artist or a great novelist, Amsterdam has all that you want in Europe (in one small city).

What European City Do You Belong In?

Cyanide and Happiness :]

Tue, 04 Dec 2007 20:16:43 GMT

Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net

I fell in love with this comic. :D

Help!

Tue, 04 Dec 2007 18:14:53 GMT

Gah. What do you get for a friend you've known for four months that has his birthday in two days?

Blah. I don't know what to get. I was thinking of some random things, like getting a dozen of kinder surprise eggs and putting them in a box after actual eggs and giving it to him, but when I proposed it to my sister she said that Max (that's my friend) doesn't seem like a person that would really get it.

And plus this is a guy! It's much harder shopping for guys than for girls!

I need an idea,and fast.

Family Love!

Mon, 03 Dec 2007 19:26:24 GMT

(Me sitting on computer in Aleks's room)
(Aleks lying on her bed, groaning)
(Aleks gets up)
Aleks: *groans* ughh. I feel like shit.
(I glance in her direction)
Me: You look like shit too.
(We start to laugh)

Don't worry, we talk like that to each other all the time. :p

Merde!

Mon, 03 Dec 2007 09:58:23 GMT

Sudas.

That is all I can say about my presentation. It was messed up, remembered everything I was supposed to say two minutes after the event. Blah. Hopefully it didn't screw up too badly. :/

If anything, we (my class of four people) still have three oral assessments, so it's still not that bad.

Okay, I shall say more later. For now I must try to concentrate on my school work. I'm in study hall, so what else am I supposed to do other than browsing the internet? :p

Enter and be Amazed Lesser Mortal, (I found this line in one story and I loved it at first glance :D)

-- J.

Life For Rent

Sun, 02 Dec 2007 14:25:34 GMT

"I haven't ever really found a place that I call home
I never stick around quite long enough to make it"

quite the story of my life.

Fuck him!

Fri, 30 Nov 2007 20:04:38 GMT

I feel like committing a genocide.

More specifically, on a certain person that keeps hurting my sister but is simply too fucking stupid to realize it. He doesn't even get it! My sister tries to explain to him that he can be hurtful and cruel sometimes, I try to explain it to him too, yet he just doesn't fucking get it. I feel like scratching his eyes out,

So I have a plan. I will talk to him again on Monday when I see him next in school (my sis is already out of school while he's in his senior year) and I will do whatever it takes to make him listen. Yell at him, stalk him until he understands, make a list of reasons why he is a jerk and bastard sometimes, and maybe - maybe - he'll get it and will think before he says something.

I mean, seriously, I see my sister always annoyed and frustrated at him after a fight, but this time she was really down and broken. I didn't even know what to say. I just don't know how it feels like to have your heart crushed by one you love, so I didn't know what to do.

Gah. Fuck him. Just... fuck him, the bloody-bloodsucking-parasite-eating off other people's emotions-conard [FR. for "bastard" or such].

Five Years Too Late Much?

Fri, 30 Nov 2007 19:48:06 GMT

(Yesterday at 10pm)

(Me on the computer while Aleks sitting on the bed reading a book)
(Dad walks in)
Dad: Okay Jo, let me on for a minute.
(I get up without a word, grab a random book and sit on the bed next to Aleks)
(silence)
Dad: So... I hear you're going to have a meeting about sex, drgus and alcohol in school...
(Aleks and I snort)
Dad: Why is it funny? And why are you having it? Has someone in your school done these things?
Aleks and I: Dad... it's just ISE.
(ten minutes later pass. Dad downstairs, I'm going down to get some tea)
Dad: Jo, come here for a second.
(I enter the living room with a questioning look)
Dad: Okay Jo, let's have a talk....

Lmao.

I'm fucking seventeen. Yes dad, of course, I have no idea what alcohol and drugs do to you or how boys at the age of 14/17 have a different view of love. No, of course I had no idea how you can get AIDS and cancer and other diseases by having sex. Nope, absolutely not.

*rolls eyes*

I had that convo in school when I was in sixth grade.

Perfect Timing.

Fri, 30 Nov 2007 19:46:27 GMT

(just to ensure I will never forget this)

(event from a few days ago)

(just copying and pasting from my facebook account)

LMAO.

Curse my perfect timing. I wanted to print out this one document for English. I waited patiently for a few moments, but the darned thing did not want to work. So I checked if my computer was connected to the printer. It was. I checked if the printer was plugged in. It was.

Finally, I look inside the printer (at least the part where the papers are suposed to come out from) and there I see a small "Stardi internetti!" card from Elion stuck in the machine. I knew of course that Aleks was the one to put the little card on the printer in the first place, so the conversation went like this,

(Aleks walking into the room)
Me: fuck you. (upon trying to get the small card out)
(Dad walks in)
Dad: watch your language! How are you speaking!
Me: well... because of her the printer doesn't want to work!
(Aleks and I with big goofy grins, trying hard not to burst out laughing)
Dad: either way, watch what you say! And Aleks, go walk Cromwell.

-- Aleks goes down, I follow her not long later --

(the two of us smile goofily)
Me: I bet the answer of, 'well, we speak like that all the time' wouldn't have helped, would it?
(we crack up)

:[

Mon, 26 Nov 2007 18:18:14 GMT

For the first time in a long while I recieved a message from an old friend from back in Poland - Wojtek. Now, as I'm going through his and some other friends's profiles I just feel like crying. I feel crappy and exhausted and in need of real friends.

I don't have any real friends. Not really. I mean, I have the usual group of people I hang out with sometimes, but it's just a temporary friendship in my eyes. After I leave for University in a year and a half, will we really stay friends? Honestly, I doubt it. For so many years I have moved and switches schools. There is no one really that I've kept contact with. It's not like I tried - I did, but finally, I just gave up I guess. I realized how long-distance friendships are not possible, same as long-distance relationships.

Hence this is why I have more "friends" I've met over the internet than here where I live. And no, I am not overaxagerating. I don't feel like my friends here know me at all, and neither do I know them. Sure, I have fun with them occasionaly, but it's not that type of bond you would share with your long time best friend.

As I look at these pictures of Wojtek and all the others, I just can't help wanting the same, yet knowing it will not be possible until I finally get myself somewhere stable where I will not move away from after a few years. It kills me slowly.

Because of this constant moving I've become very anti-social and lonely. I can't really just go up to anyone and hang out with them. It takes me time just to get used to a person. Only after a few months would I really start to open up. This year I hoped it would be different. I changed a bit, at the start of the year. A new student came and I was friendly; talkative. That didn't last long. About a month or even more ago I came back to my old self, closing up on everyone technically.

People say they want to travel a lot, huh? Move around? They hate being stuck in the same place their whole life? You know, I'd change places with them at any point. At least they have the stability, they have their friends they've known all their lives. Moving constantly every few years and finally when you end up being best friends with someone, BAM! You move; you leave. It's neither fun or helpful, and I don't even give a damn about the good sides of moving.

I would rather know either Polish and live in Poland all my life or know Polish and French and live in Belgium all my life (I preferre the second option).

Just be happy with where you are. Be happy you have someone you can call a best friend or even a good friend. I can't really call anyone like that except my older sister (who will be gone for University by September. I don't know how I will survive without her.)

Blaaaah

Thu, 25 Oct 2007 18:16:15 GMT

Ahh. Joy for organization and preparations for annual sucky school Halloween Dance. Sadly, I'm in charge of the music. You sure can trust people to their jobs! I've once more been pulled into the decorations committee even though I've planned most of the event, organized how everything was going to take place and gotten chaperones! I was just then supposed to choose the music for the dance and be the DJ for it! Gah.

And since in my school the students have different tastes in music, I've asked them to give me some titles of songs that they would like to hear during the dance. Number of people that came back to me with a list? Two. Fun. THAT is how I can trust people, right? Seriously, you can't count on anybody but yourself these days. People are just lazy and egoistical and they can't even do one simple thing they are asked of when others just want to use it in order to please everyone else. Blah. Just wait and see. I'm just gonna play Cher and Celine Dion or something the whole night. Or better yet the Vega Boys, Backstreet Boys and Britney Spears. But the earlier songs.

And people wonder why I complain so much.

Words

Wed, 24 Oct 2007 20:06:28 GMT

Exhausted                                   Pain                                 Devastated

                            Frustrated                              Annoyed                     Confused


          Laughing stock                              Hurt                                Schadenfreude



Sleepy                                    Eager                             Out of Mind

                        Lost                       Obsessed                                Pessimistic


                 Terrified                                              Skeptical                               Malice